Category Archives: Funny

Jan8

Last of the Peppermint Stick

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Last of the Peppermint Stick

 

Good Morning,

I can’t remember if there was an occasion that brought out this childhood joy, but I think more often than not, it happened on Lawrence Welk night!
You could see the Admiral from the small dining room table when it had the leaf on the room side flipped up and you put the back down on the first lazy boy in the small living room on 1st St.
Grandma Anna would come out of the kitchen with a cold box, presented on a tray. I don’t know why!
I think, for a grin and the drama.
I’d lean so close to watch that I had to be told to “get off the table!”
It was Neapolitan Ice Cream in a box.
A crazy time for me. These people never adventured!!!!
She’d lay that box open to the pink/chocolate/white (what my mind at that age saw)
Then, so we could bear witness, she slice it so we all get some of each color, down the middle and begin to divide it in perfectly equal portions for all of us, with always the slightly larger mistake end to the grandpa.
Didn’t care!
Seems a little strange that I should ask you if you remember Lawrence Welk night, as I sit here this morning satisfying my craving for Peppermint Stick ice cream this January 8th morning.
All of this is to remind you that Peppermint Stick ice cream is quickly disappearing with the season!
We’re on our last box, so get out there and check the shelves at your grocery!
A smart grocer would use it as a loss leader and advertise, “Last load of Peppermint Stick ice cream folks!”
And then add as a postscript.
First load of Chocolate Mint is arriving, January 14th!”
Make room! rdd

Nov14

Mosquito

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Sitting upon my throne
Doing a morning chore
When I looked up from my Digest
To see her hiding 
Behind the bathroom door.

Filled with my blood 
She stood
Blinded by the light
I grabbed a wad
Too neatly
Folded it just right!

I had just been thinking 
How nice it was 
The cold outside
Would finally do them in
And wouldn’t you know
Just as I thought that
I found one, within!

So I leaned forward
One crouching step 
Side shuffling my pants across the floor
And squashed that
Flying sucker
That will suck my blood 
No more!

Ronald Douglas Drobeck 9:45 am
11/13/18 ….. came out ten minutes ago.

Nov6

verse 11:6:17 08:59am zona time

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Finally, I now have coffee controlled awareness. LOL
Good Morning again. My second stage awareness has begun. The first one was First stage where I recognize that I’m perpendicular and breathing.

 

 

 

 

 

A proper piece of pumpkin pie

*****************

For those of you that read my post last evening, this is important!
I occasionally suffer from over-enthusiasm and fictional writer’s imagination. It is very dramatic and I even cultivate it. But, it can cause me to imagine that I’m really better than I am which then causes ‘panic’ when I realize that I may not be!!!!! LOLOLOL
Insane! Absolutely! I have voluntarily subjected myself to the influence of a second caffeine delivery system, coffee. The evening withdrawal is hell as I slowly slide into a different reality.
Like, “I may not be as good as I think I am now that the caffeine and ibuprofen have worn off!”
The picture comes into mind of a novice actor coming on stage with bright lights in his eyes, thinking that there is a whole audience out there, gives the self-thought performance of his life, the lights come up and there is no one there! Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. LOL
When you put yourself out there like I do with art, photographs, music, opinions and entertainment, then go to the audience count on your ‘wonderful, international’ website and the count is one (1), uno ……….. and that one was yourself for posting a new post, you have to come to the realization that everybody is not thinking about you all of the time! You’ve got to remember that on the days when you self promote on Facebook and other media, your numbers go up and it is more fun.
Well, being out of town to a baseball tournament certainly cut into my ‘self promotion’ fun and time. The numbers sucked. So, prepare yourselves.
I’m baaaaaa, aaaaaaak! LOL
Disregard all of the above. It’s the 2nd stage coffee talking and I won’t be normal again until tonight when the coffee and the ibuprofen wear off.
Here in is the first verse of 11:6:17 8:59 zona time. rdd

Dec29

They Day I Saved the Army

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The Day I Saved the Army

My son’s boot camp graduation somewhere in the southeast.  After the graduation ceremonies at Army boot camp, the parents of the recruits and the recruits were invited to eat lunch in a room that had a folding pocket door room divider.

So many people showed up for this graduation that they had to open this wall so more people could hear the commanding officer welcome everyone, have a short prayer, and eat hastily prepared chicken.  The General at the podium, realizing the door needed to be opened, ordered the officer standing next to him to have that door opened. That officer told the  lower ranking officer next to him who ordered the sergeant standing next to him, who ordered a another one and on down the line.

Anyway, it went down through maybe 7 ranks. Finally, the last man corporal walked over and turned the locking handle and then went to the wall to switch the switch that electrically started moving the folding doors toward the pocket.  A couple of the folding doors went in to the pocket on queue and then the doors would stop moving, would rattle like a stopping train and then jam. The corporal would move the switch to ‘open’ the two doors would come out of the pocket, the wall would be made and he’d switch to ‘close’ again. The same thing would happen, two doors in, it would make that sound and then jam.

This happened several times while everybody was watching, including the General with all of his little duckies heads turned to the right staring at that door and the little corporal switch switcher.

After several minutes of people trying to command this wall into the pocket, I pulled back my chair, walked over to a joint that I could see was jammed opposite of the way it needed to be.  I motioned to the kid to hit that switch, two doors went in and I banged the contrary joint in the correct direction with the side of my fist just before it was required to bend.

There was a steady hum and movement as each panel slowly followed the other into their little pocket as designed.

I very business like, calmly walked back to my seat and sat back down next to my son to enjoy that terrible chicken more than anyone else in the place as the General spoke his piece.

Nobody knew……………………I was X-Navy!

True story! It’s one of those medals I awarded myself that only Jesse and I can see, tucked into the vapors of unwritten history……….until now!